Thursday, November 19, 2009

Holly Jolly Flu Shots?

Move over Wall Street warriors and Gitmo detainees. Someone else is angling to cut in the H1N1 vaccination line. Santa. That's right the Jolly One himself--or rather his emissaries -- want their flu shots before all those cute, germ-infested tykes hit red velvet laps at malls across America. I kid you not. The Amalgamated Order of Real Bearded Santas (yeah, they're for real), says their guys are more susceptible to the dreaded swine flu-- and not only because of their proximity to all those sweet germ carriers. Most Santas tote their own girth and obesity may increase your risk of getting the disease and its severity. The CDC and other health honchos are "looking into the request." In the meantime, Santas are advised to use massive amounts of hand sanitizer and take extra vitamins.

So forget the milk and cookies. This year, put out orange juice and a plate of assorted vitamins. And just to be on the safe side, you might want to leave out a box of Kleenex, too. Wouldn't want to find any unexpected "goodies" under the tree.

Drive safe. Play nice. Sneeze into your sleeve.

aba

1 comment:

momarati said...

WE SHOULD ALL WANT TO PROTECT SANTA, RIGHT?
LOVED THE ARTICLE AND I LOVE THEIR UNION. WHAT ABOUT THE ELVES? DON'T THEY RATE? DO THEY HAVE A UNION! THINK PEACE - RAMONA